queerpotters:

Kristen Stewart in ‘Just One Of The Guys’ by Jenny Lewis (x)

At roughly 2:35, Kristen Stewart waggles her eyebrows in suggestive delight at the viewer, then beckons to herself as if to say “Me? You? You? Me? Is this happening? Let’s make this happen.” Kristen Stewart contains more drollery in the crook of her little finger than you have in your entire miserable carcass.

You are a piece of shit and I hate you. I would cheerfully slide a knife across your eyelids to spend three-quarters of a minute looking at Kristen Stewart’s neck from a respectful distance.” [x]

Anonymous asked:
"dating advice?"

magnezone:

everybody is an enormous waste of time 

puckling:

itsmydarkesthour:

hippies-like-us:

kuneria:

Bob Ross soothes and calms and makes me happy like nothing else I’ve ever known.

Fun fact: Bob Ross was a Marine drill sergeant for several years, but quit because he didn’t like yelling at people.

Actually he was in the Air Force and retired after 20 years as a Master Sergeant. And he reportedly quit because he could make more money painting than he could in the military, although it was true that he didn’t like yelling at people.    

"

A woman who hates you is playing the pianoforte.

You have five hundred a year. From who? Five hundred what? No one knows. No one cares. You have it. It’s yours. Every year. All five hundred of it.

A charming man attempts to flirt with you. This is terrible.

You are in a garden, and you are astonished.

"
sleepybrowneyes:

seifukucat:

googled “dog swearing” and wasn’t disappointed

His fucking look of determination. Like, “you’re going to fucking jail Greg.”

sleepybrowneyes:

seifukucat:

googled “dog swearing” and wasn’t disappointed

His fucking look of determination. Like, “you’re going to fucking jail Greg.”

"

Subban sparked controversy in January for celebrating too hard after an overtime goal versus the Ottawa Senators. After scoring the winner, he dashed across the ice to his teammates, hugged them, then tugged on his jersey a couple times.

Dastardly.

Meawhile, Patrick Kane shouted “Showtime!” after scoring a big playoff goal versus the Wild, and no one cared. But if he was Evander Kane…

And can you imagine what people would say about, say, the way Rick Nash’s goal totals tend to match his assist totals — a hint that he’s an incredible goal-scorer with terrible vision — if he looked more like Dustin Byfuglien? He’d have been pegged as a selfish player ages ago. One wonders how many Olympic teams he’d have made. But there are no questions about Nash’s commitment to his teammates.

Patrick Kane and Rick Nash are both highlight-reel players. Ethnic ‘em up a bit, on the other hand, and the stuff that makes them special players becomes the stuff that makes them problems. The coverage would change.

"

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

i love the term “bear with me” because it could mean either 1 of 2 things:

  • asking someone to be patient
  • confirmation that the zoo heist was a success